- The Guardian: Any advice for a 21-year-old who hates their job and has the possibility of traveling the world? And has a boyfriend that they like. (This is for a friend.)
- Rob Delaney: Go do it. Fuck him. Is he a guy in his 20s? Then he's the least significant type of person on the planet. A male in their 20s? Run in the opposite direction. Nothing he says matters; his fears, his hopes his dreams are garbage. Men in their 20s are the worst thing happening on our planet. Go, go to Uzbekistan, go to South Korea, just go anywhere he isn't because men in their 20s are bad for young women.
- The Guardian: So what do women in their 20s do?
- Rob Delaney: Masturbate. Date other women for a while. Use men sexually for a while but don't ever invite their opinion or be bound to them in any way.
I feel like every man who has ever tried to convince me to take some rando shouting “Hey girl, nice ass” at me as a compliment sees it this way: You’re sitting outside some Italian café in a Betty Draper dress sipping a prosecco when all of a sudden your dainty neck scarf flies off in the light breeze. Joseph Gordon Levitt, wearing a linen suit with a pocket square and no socks with his penny loafers, steps off his Vespa and hands it to you while saying something witty about how it’s almost as beautiful as you are. You then both ride off into the sunset, laughing as Dean Martin plays in the background and the director yells cut on the espresso commercial that is your life.
In reality, it’s you getting yelled at by a bunch of sweaty men standing outside a bar at eight in the morning, telling you about how fuckable you look in your sweatpants when you’re just trying to get a bottle of milk in peace like a goddamn human being. And it is the opposite of a compliment.
FUCKING THIS. I had to sit for almost half of my hour lunch the other day and explain to a co-worker why street harassment DOES NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES flatter me.
And sorry, even if you’re JGL, shouting “nice tits!” at me, wolf whistling, or driving up next to me and beeping your horn will never be flattering. It’s creepy and degrading and makes me fear for my safety.
I was trying to explain this to one of my guy friend’s the other day, and I just couldn’t articulate. But this explains it perfectly.